Analysis of the Relationship

Abstract

Relationships are complex and require effective communication between the involved parties. Communication is essential because it influences the ability to resolve existing issues. Relational skills developed throughout life are essential in the development of the relationships. This paper looks into a past relationship and analyzes it in terms of the communication processes. Aspects such as mate selection, commitment in the relationship, and influence of the parental factors are analyzed in the development of the relationship.

Analysis of the Relationship

Communication processes are essential in the development of any relationship. Communication is a complex process that enables two or more people to interact and share messages and ideas. Communication is essential in efforts to develop solutions to problems and manage issues in the relationships. Communication problems sometimes arise, when people from different backgrounds interact and try to determine the best ways to solve their issues or progress in a personal relationship. Relational skills develop throughout life as individuals interact with their families and other members of the society. The development of relational and psychological skills is dependent on the relationships developed in the family. This means communication and the relationship between parents and their children have a significant influence on their relationships and communication with other people.

The relationship

The relationship under consideration in this paper involved me and another individual (T), who was a close friend of mine. This relationship was highly significant because it gave me an opportunity to open up to someone and share things that were bothering me. The nature of the relationship allowed us to share intimate thoughts and issues that would affect our future both individually and together. This relationship was memorable because it was based on a shared feeling of trust, commitment interdependence and disclosure. This relationship was based on fair and just treatment of both parties and spending a lot of time together.

Relationships are developed basing on the social-psychological aspects of people involved. Potential costs and gains of the relationship form a significant aspect of the decision to develop the relationship (Surra, 1985). Communication was a key aspect in the development of the relationship because it was critical in determining the existence of common interests and factors between T. and me. This relationship developed when we had gone for a charity event along with other members of the school. Our common interest in helping the disadvantaged people placed us at a common place, where the relationship was initiated. A brief conversation as acquaintances resulted in the recognition of a possible match for courtship. The relationship developed gradually with increased knowledge of the other person’s feelings and perceptions on different issues.

Factors that influenced the development of a relationship

Development of the relationship was influenced by physical and social attraction. This was because of the individual’s physical appearance, which was appealing, and because of the involvement in charity. We also had many things in common, which eased our interaction. Having common interests in sports such as football, nature, and music increased our ability to share and enjoy time together. During the initial stages of the relationship, we enjoyed time together watching football games and going out for picnics and other forms of nature walks. The social exchange approach was essential in the development of the relationship. Exogenous rewards from the relationship in terms of psychological fulfillment and social comfort outweighed the potential costs of the relationship making it beneficial.

The relationship was influenced by my early experiences of watching interactions between my parents and between other siblings. My expectations for how the ideal relationship should be were influenced by experiences from my early life. Those experiences showed me the significance of communication in a relationship. My parents taught me to talk about issues that were affecting me in order to clear issues and ensure harmony. This was significant in the development of my relationship because I had to select somebody, who was an excellent communicator and was open to discussing contentious issues to prevent conflicts. Security in my parental attachment increased my ability to trust and thus feel more secure in the relationship. This also ensures that the partner feels confident in discussing issues and opening up on sensitive issues. The level of intimacy in the relationship was fostered by the disclosure and feedback resulting in us sharing a deep relationship that enabled both parties to feel secure.

The relationship developed gradually at different rates based on the level of interaction and how much information was shared. At the beginning of the relationship, there was little interaction at school and some informal events. Increased interaction during games and outings enabled us to share personal information at a higher level. The increase in the range of activities was essential in enabling us to understand each other deeply. This was essential in issues such as personal fears and seeing things in the other person’s context. Involvement in chores, studying and other activities together increased our understanding of each other and thus the appropriate assessment of the relationship. Involvement in these activities allowed us to interact in different contexts and understand how the other party behaves in different circumstances.

The courtship process begins with the selection of the mate. It is mainly based on the degree of fit between the individual attributes of the partners. The interpersonal process model articulates other factors in the decision such as the physical environment and social networks in mate selection. Third parties in the relationship have a significant effect on the movement towards commitment in the relationship (Chang and Chan, 2007). Our relationship was enforced by my parents, who thought my partner was an appropriate choice and was helping me to become a better person. Classmates and personal acquaintances though the relationship would be successful, because we had many things in common. Continued interaction increased my beliefs and perceptions about the relationship. They enabled the assessment of behaviors and beliefs improving the level of commitment towards the relationship.